Monday, October 29, 2007

Pre-Season Power Rankings

As I write this post, there is currently a banner ad on Best League Ever Blog that looks like this:

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Anyways, it's time for the pre-season Mr. League Power Rankings.

#1 - Mighty Mullets
Right now the Mullets have it all. Depth, youth, versatility, and a solid front court with Pau and Dirk. There are at least 4 guys on his team that should take it to the next level this season, especially Danny Granger. Nenad needs to remain healthy and continue to improve, because Zaza (Nenad lite) isn't scaring anyone, and Bynum is still looking pretty young. Thornton was a nice pickup that could help out in the scoring department. DK may be a crotchety old man, but his team is young and virile.

#2 - Mama Looch
Lots of depth up front, three top centers in Bosh, Duncan, and Okafor, as well as Bargnani who should start to show why he was #1 pick last year. Nene is the wild card, but could be big if he's healthy. The guards will be solid in %'s and scoring, but don't look for too many 100 dime weeks from Looch. Walter Hermann and Acie Law will soon be on the waiver wire. Still, the depth is there, and I like the strategy.

#3 - The Burning Sensation
Great auction value on Josh Howard, Caron Butler, and Al Jefferson. If Wade comes back and stays healthy, this team could be #1 with that core 4. Hinrich and Ilgauskas are solid mid-level players, and Bogut and Rasheed are certainly workable PFs. Can Peja revive his career? If so, we better watch out for The Clap.

#4 - Moop Resurrected
Depth, but no superstars. Dwight Howard went for too much, but still a lot of value here in Redd, KMart, Okur, Mo Williams. This team's success also hinges on the health of Richardson, Odom, Jefferson, etc. I'll believe in this strategy when I see it work, until then, I say you need a core.

#5 - The Flux
Believe in your core. This is why I have faith in The Flux this year. His big 4 is as good as anyone's (Marion, Rashard, Vince, Chauncey) but it drops off quite a bit there. Rondo should have a nice year, Kaman could bounce back with Brand out, but the rest is garbage. Still, I think The Flux is one or two shrewd waiver moves from contention.

#6 - Blue Balls
Arenas is sick, and still somehow underrated. Luol Deng has emerged as a solid contributor. Gerald Wallace is a fantasy monster when healthy. The problem with this team is Jermaine O'Neal, because I strongly question his durability and work ethic, but if he holds up, this is a playoff team.

#7 - Best Team Ever
Garnett is still solid, and makes a good core with Iguodala and Joe Johnson. That's about where it ends, though. There's some solid talent, but no proven stars. Aldridge should take a huge leap this year, though. He has to for Best Team Ever to have hope at repeating as Mr. League champ.

#8 - Mikey's Roofies
The loss of Bibby hurts, but LeBron and Nash will carry this team as usual. Watch for Jamal Crawford to have a career year in New York.

#9 - Loser's Row
Josh Smith and Amare are exciting players. Along with Pierce, the core three are solid, but injuries might be a concern with Chandler and Ginobili on the team as well.

#10 - Cardiff Giant
A solid core 5 (AI, Allen, Baron, T-Mac, Boozer) but again, not without an injury history. Diaw is having a decent pre-season, but the bottom 6 on this team is horrendous. No depth = no playoffs.

#11 - Yom Kippur at Joel's
If Ron Artest finds Jesus or something, maybe this team has a chance. As far as I know, Artest is still a mentally disturbed fuckwit, and he will explode at some point this season. Kidd was a good pick, but West and Durant went for too much. Kobe needs to have another MVP year for this team to have a chance.

#12 - The Misers
Yao is solid, as long as he's healthy. Ditto for Chris Paul. Carmelo was a steal! It's a fine core 3 strategy, but that's when things go sour. Ben Wallace, old and wealthy, is nursing injury. Roy has impending surgery. Kirilenko? Just a matter of time, my man. And then a bunch of plug-in nobody players... oh, and Elton Brand. The only prayer this team has is if Brand is this year's Pau Gasol. That's doesn't seem likely.

Alright, that's it for now. Best of luck to everyone, see you fuckers next week!

1 comment:

Best Team Ever said...

I was in total disagreement with these rankings starting right at the top, but then I got to #12 and all was right with the world again. Any rankings that end up with The Misers at the bottom are solid in my book. Great job, Mikey's Roofies. (Change your login name).